The Economics of Dummies

I realized something the other day. I drink way too damn much pop. I’d guess that I spend roughly eighty to one hundred dollars per month on soda alone, and that doesn’t include what I drink when I go out to dinner with friends (which I also do way too damn much). These numbers come directly from the Sasquatchinc Thin Air Statistical Generator™ by the way. So I had an idea. I am going to scale down the amount of pop that I drink by one half for two months, and then try again to cut it out completely after two months. During the scale down process, I plan to purchase only generic brands so as to further save money.

Here’s the kicker. Rather than spend that extra money on some other completely worthless endeavor (like movies or charity), I plan to invest it in international currencies. But rather than purchase Yen and Franks willy nilly, I plan to employ the Graham value added method of investing with my own relative GDP analysis thrown in on top for good measure (not from the Thin Air Generator, by the way). This way, I get to analyze things like political upheaval, social acceptance of capitalistic endeavors and other social things I don’t understand as opposed to balance sheets, cash statements, and other accounting tricks I never cared to learn.

It’s almost like a game! Except here there’s a chance I might actually make some money in the process. And even if I don’t, so what? It’s better than pouring it all down my throat in the form of the sweet, divine nectar of Diet Mountain Dew. And in the process, I finally get to put my other degree (International Strategic Management) to use.

Whether that use can be categorized as “good” remains to be seen. Given that the degree in question is from the prestigious University of Cincinnati school of business, it probably won’t be.