Friday, September 09, 2005

Sasquatch for President

I’m planning on running for President in 2008 under the BIG IDEAS party (and it all has to be in capital letters, too, or else it isn’t really a big idea). Here are a few of the things I have come up with so far:

1) Caffeinated orange juice.
2) The four day work week (No-work Mondays for everybody!)
3) No-fee ATM’s
4) Houses built on pontoons for those people living near flood-prone planes.
5) Cars that run on crappy music: an endless energy source!
6) Did I mention the four day work week?
7) Shorter lines at the supermarket.
8) No more movies starring Ben Affleck and more movies starring Selma Hayek.
9) The shortening of important lists from 10 to 9.

Vote Sasquatch, the BIG IDEA candidate in 2008, because you weren’t going to vote anyway and at least with me you have additional sources of caffeine!


Sean said...

working for the church is like a one day work week, but i still liked what you said better.

Uber_Tech said...

dude, your a answer to prayer
who do i send my checks for your slush fund to?

The Sasquatch said...

You can send your checks to me! I am running my own slush fund. And the beauty is that, if I get elected, the exchange fees you would have had to pay for banking out of state will be eliminated retroactive to the beginning of 2005! We all win!